Sunday, January 1, 2012

Does that make me crazy?

I keep asking myself, "what's wrong with you Coco?" En fait (in fact), I ask myself this question far too often these days. I ask myself other questions like "why do you hate the holidays?" After all, time off from school is supposed to be restful, nice, rewarding, etc...but for me it isn't. I do much better at work....at school...with people...in a routine. I CANNOT WAIT TO GO BACK TO SCHOOL! I have had much difficulty coping with all of this free time that I have and when there's no one to talk to ...one begins to talk to one's self....inside one's head. That is a dangerous place to hang out. Anyway, due to this excess of temps libre...I have had a short stint with what I believe to be a mild depression...I've also had lots of tea. It's probably not that serious...we all know I'm a drama queen sometimes, but life would be utterly boring if I weren't I suppose.

Thanks to help from loyal friends like Christine and Beyonce Knowles I have recovered...I think. Christine kindly took me to the supermarket after a long Facebook conversation that revealed my temporary insanity. Beyonce wrote this song a long time ago, but it's evident she was thinking of my crazy ass...


Sing it girl.

Thank goodness for Beyonce. I've been blasting Me, Myself, and I, along with several other ridiculous yet oddly empowering songs on my brand new speakers that I purchased for 15 euros at Leclerc. Doesn't take much to make me happy...just 15 euros :)...anyhow it's all part of the treatment...for my depression...

In order for my recovery to be complete...I've decided that I need to throw a fabulous party to celebrate the new year and my blog reaching 1,000 pageviews (that's not a lot I realize, but....I'm proud). If everything goes right, all of the best people will be there, and we will eat, drink, and be crazy...three things that I feel we're good at here in Brioude...at least that's our reputation among the other assistants I think...I hope...let's face it...they probably never talk about us. heh heh.

In addition to this soiree, I've decided I would like to cut most of my hair off. This is rather impetuous I know and probably a bad idea, but I always feel better after a haircut and most of my hair is dead anyway...I  will feel like a new woman...I think. I am also inspired by Audrey Tautou's look in "La Delicatesse," a film I recently saw...by myself! I've never felt like such an ass going it alone to the movies (I was surrounded by groups of post-menopausal women and one guy who was dragged there by his girlfriend), but the film was good anyway...too good...it made me smile...several times.


she's just too fab

Today was very good. That's probably an understatement. I had lunch with Christine's family...you know to celebrate the new year. The food (and drink) was delicious and plentiful (another understatement). I'm really glad I was invited. It's good to be around good people, and I wish I spoke French well enough to really tell them how much I appreciate them including me, and how sweet they are for making me feel at home...hell I don't speak English well enough to really say how I feel sometimes. But I didn't spend the beginning of the year alone and that means the world to me. Oh and the food was REALLY good...I don't think I put enough stress on that the first time.

This post is kind of rubbish...can't believe I just used that word...but it seemed appropriate. I mean, who wants to read about that time that I was sad and lonely for...I dunno five days? No one...so hopefully in the future...I won't be? Maybe that can be my New Year's resolution. I resolve to not be alone...it's not good for me. But I suppose we can't always be on top of things...and you always have to have the bad with the good right?

1 comment:

  1. "Why do you hate the holidays?"

    The holidays can be a very stressful season.
    All the anticipation of what is to come.
    All the effort to make everything "perfect".
    All the small conflicts that come up to spoil your plans.
    All the people that are missing from the gathering.
    All the strain to make everyone happy, sometimes at your own expense.
    All the time that you just want to get away and relax. At the end of the day you are just happy that the day is ending.

    Just put a priority on doing something special for yourself. It sounds selfish but don't forget that you are a very special person.

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